One year ago today, we had just cancelled Bible study, Kellie and Clay had picked up Caleb to spend the night at their house, and I was dusting our house. My contractions were picking up, but it was definitely still the "fun" part of labor. I knew I had to get to the hospital fairly quickly because I needed the group B strep antibiotic before she was born. Given the quickness of Caleb's birth, I wanted to make sure that I was there early. We checked into the hospital around 11:00 pm with my contractions around 4 or 5 minutes apart. I was sufficiently dilated and I went on to my room. We called our families and they rushed to the hospital. Once again, given the speed of Caleb's delivery, no one wanted to miss it. Well, it turns out that Karis was going to take a little longer which was fine because I needed that antibiotic. Instead of sleeping, we all stayed up and talked...all night long. I didn't have any pain medicine, but it was fine because it really didn't hurt anyway. We laughed, told jokes, and had a great time. There was some sleeping that went on (Ashley had been up since 3:00 am the day before), but mostly we just hung out. At 4:00 am, I had finished my antibiotic, so we started getting serious about having a baby. They broke my water and the contractions began. At 5:00 am, they checked me again and I hadn't changed (still 6cm). From that point on though, it's all a blur. I think the exam set things off because she started to come and man did she come. At 6ish the nurse came in, and I asked her to check me. I told her (or whoever was listening) that if I wasn't ready to push that someone better line up some good pain medicine because I was over it being natural. Thankfully I was 10 cm and ready to push. I gave a practice push, three good pushes (sets of pushes) and thought she was just about out. All of a sudden things got kind of tense in the room. They said she was stuck. I had people on my stomach telling me to push even though there wasn't a contraction to push with. I'm pretty sure that someone's arm was inside of me but I only know that because of bystanders in the room (Ashley and my mom) telling me that it happened. All I knew was that I was doing the hardest thing I had ever done and that I had to do it well. Then she was here, taking her first breath, letting out her first cry, and wiggling her way into my heart. I was completely spent and had no energy at all, but within a few minutes I sat up, held her and was ready to do it all over again. It's really amazing how God does that. The love that we are able to have for our children is nothing short of a miracle.
As I recall that night one year ago, I can't believe how quickly the past year has gone by. I have LOVED watching her grow and change.
She loves to give hugs and will tuck her head under your chin and just squeeze you (she especially loves giving Ashley hugs).
She gives the sweetest, sloppiest, open mouth kisses and then says "mmmmmah."
She has taken her first steps, but I wouldn't say that she's walking yet.
She loves to dance.
She's a little monkey and climbs on everything (and falls off on occassion).
She adores her big brother.
She has learned to screech when she doesn't get what she wants, something is taken away from her that she wants, or she wants something in general...we're working on this a lot.
She loves being in the water...especially the toilet:)
She's starting to sign when she wants something...all done, more, please are the ones she uses the most. Today when we were taking a walk (she was in the stroller), she signed all done and said "ahhh don." I asked her if she was ready to stop to which she responded with the sign for more and said "mo mo mo."
She says several things, Mama, Dada, Hi Kitty, Dog, Bye Bye, Hi, Ahhh Don (all done), Mo Mo Mo (more), and lots and lots of other babble words. She has the sweetest little voice and apparently loves to hear it as much as we do due to all the "talking" she does:)
She has the sweetest smile in the world. It lights up her whole face when she smiles, especially her eyes.
She recognizes friends and family and gets excited about seeing them.
She is such a happy baby. She rarely ever cries or fusses unless something is wrong (or she's not getting what she really wants - see above - and even that is over very quickly).
She is so easy going and laid back.
She is tough as nails!
It's amazing that in just one year, she has gone from completely helpless to this sweet little child on the brink of toddlerhood with an amazing personality. We are so thankful for her life and for the blessing that God has given us in her. We can't wait to see what God has in store for her life!
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Happy Birthday Caleb!
It has been sooo long since I've posted and I've missed it. There are many many reasons that I haven't had a chance to write, but I'm not going it to it today. Today is about Caleb and celebrating his three years of life!
We started last night by telling him about the night before he was born. He loves to hear our stories and kept asking questions (mostly "why"). Then this morning I told him the next section of the story about going to the hospital and knowing that we were giong to hold our first baby boy soon. When Ashley got home, it was around 11:45 and we told him about him being born and how we were amazed at the miracle that God had just given us. Then tonight when we were putting him to sleep, we told him about our first night in the hospital with him when it was just Daddy, Mommy, and Caleb. We are so thankful for the three years that we've had with him and for the amazing little boy that he's become. This is what we love about him the most:
He has the sweetest little voice in the world.
He sings all the time and knows so many songs. So many times they come out of nowhere. It could be a song that we haven't sung in months and he'll still remember all the words.
He prays for his friends and family. Sometimes he's in a hurry, but usually he seems to know just who to pray for.
He loves the mud, running, playing ball, and all things boy.
He crawls in our laps to read and will sit there for so long. Going to the library is one of his favorite things to do.
He gets excited about playing with his friends. They can play together in relative peace and have the most fun games that they make up. I found he and Dayla sitting in the recliner together a few weeks ago. They were "reading" a book to each other.
He really does love Karis even though he doesn't really like for her to take his toys. I've found them playing together so sweetly recently. I love it:)
He's witty and has a great sense of humor. He always knows just how to make us laugh.
He has an amazing joy for life that makes his eyes sparkle when he's excited about something.
He always wants to do his best.
He loves playing with play doh, washing anything in the sink, and helping us do things. His new thing to say is, "I'm a great helper."
He loves to work in the garden, planting things, digging holes, watering the plants, etc.
He loves cooking, sprouting seeds, making bread, juicing vegetables, etc.
He is absolutely the sweetest kiddo in the world. We love you Caleb and are so thankful that God has given us three years with you.
(I'll post pictures of the party after this weekend)
We started last night by telling him about the night before he was born. He loves to hear our stories and kept asking questions (mostly "why"). Then this morning I told him the next section of the story about going to the hospital and knowing that we were giong to hold our first baby boy soon. When Ashley got home, it was around 11:45 and we told him about him being born and how we were amazed at the miracle that God had just given us. Then tonight when we were putting him to sleep, we told him about our first night in the hospital with him when it was just Daddy, Mommy, and Caleb. We are so thankful for the three years that we've had with him and for the amazing little boy that he's become. This is what we love about him the most:
He has the sweetest little voice in the world.
He sings all the time and knows so many songs. So many times they come out of nowhere. It could be a song that we haven't sung in months and he'll still remember all the words.
He prays for his friends and family. Sometimes he's in a hurry, but usually he seems to know just who to pray for.
He loves the mud, running, playing ball, and all things boy.
He crawls in our laps to read and will sit there for so long. Going to the library is one of his favorite things to do.
He gets excited about playing with his friends. They can play together in relative peace and have the most fun games that they make up. I found he and Dayla sitting in the recliner together a few weeks ago. They were "reading" a book to each other.
He really does love Karis even though he doesn't really like for her to take his toys. I've found them playing together so sweetly recently. I love it:)
He's witty and has a great sense of humor. He always knows just how to make us laugh.
He has an amazing joy for life that makes his eyes sparkle when he's excited about something.
He always wants to do his best.
He loves playing with play doh, washing anything in the sink, and helping us do things. His new thing to say is, "I'm a great helper."
He loves to work in the garden, planting things, digging holes, watering the plants, etc.
He loves cooking, sprouting seeds, making bread, juicing vegetables, etc.
He is absolutely the sweetest kiddo in the world. We love you Caleb and are so thankful that God has given us three years with you.
(I'll post pictures of the party after this weekend)
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Gratitude
"Thou hast given so much to me, give me one thing more, a grateful heart. Not thankful when it pleaseth me as if thy blessings had spare days, but such a heart whose pulse may be thy praise." George Herbert
I wrote this quote on my mirror a long time ago (like 5 years), but I keep it up there because it is so profound to me. God has given me so much - a great family, a great house, good health, a wonderful job, SALVATION, the fruits of the spirit, and these are just the big things. Every day He pours out His love on me in the small details of my life. I am amazed by how much He loves me and wants His best for my life.
As much as He gives me, I need to ask for one thing more...a grateful heart. How do we let ourselves become so ungrateful? Now I would never say, "God I'm just not thankful for what you've done for me. I wish you'd do a little more." However, I have been known to long for more than I have, to be discontent with my roles in life, to covet other things, to be irritable and grouchy with my husband/kids, and to murmur and complain. Obviously we are not perfect (it's why we need a savior) and I know that I'm going to be irritable and grouchy on occassion, but don't all of those things stem from an ungrateful heart? What if we were to focus on being grateful and all of the things that we have to be thankful for every day. I'm not talking about giving God a quick thanks, but truly living a life from a heart that is overwhelmed with thankfulness. I was reading in Acts today about Stephen being martyred. Even in dying, he was grateful for his savior. How many times a day do I lose focus of all that God has done for me over the dumbest things like having to wait in line, getting cut off while driving, kids acting out (at work and my own), not being able to buy something that I want to buy...
The quote petitions God that we would not be thankful just when it pleases us (you know, when things are going well) AS IF GOD'S BLESSINGS HAD SPARE DAYS. That part blows me away every time I read it. God's blessings are never spare. He never says, "Today I'm not going to bless Lesli." His blessings are there, we just have to look, to get our focus off of the things that are not right, and to embrace what He's done for us. It's only then that we will live the abundant life that He's prepared for us and have a heart whose "pulse may be His praise!"
I wrote this quote on my mirror a long time ago (like 5 years), but I keep it up there because it is so profound to me. God has given me so much - a great family, a great house, good health, a wonderful job, SALVATION, the fruits of the spirit, and these are just the big things. Every day He pours out His love on me in the small details of my life. I am amazed by how much He loves me and wants His best for my life.
As much as He gives me, I need to ask for one thing more...a grateful heart. How do we let ourselves become so ungrateful? Now I would never say, "God I'm just not thankful for what you've done for me. I wish you'd do a little more." However, I have been known to long for more than I have, to be discontent with my roles in life, to covet other things, to be irritable and grouchy with my husband/kids, and to murmur and complain. Obviously we are not perfect (it's why we need a savior) and I know that I'm going to be irritable and grouchy on occassion, but don't all of those things stem from an ungrateful heart? What if we were to focus on being grateful and all of the things that we have to be thankful for every day. I'm not talking about giving God a quick thanks, but truly living a life from a heart that is overwhelmed with thankfulness. I was reading in Acts today about Stephen being martyred. Even in dying, he was grateful for his savior. How many times a day do I lose focus of all that God has done for me over the dumbest things like having to wait in line, getting cut off while driving, kids acting out (at work and my own), not being able to buy something that I want to buy...
The quote petitions God that we would not be thankful just when it pleases us (you know, when things are going well) AS IF GOD'S BLESSINGS HAD SPARE DAYS. That part blows me away every time I read it. God's blessings are never spare. He never says, "Today I'm not going to bless Lesli." His blessings are there, we just have to look, to get our focus off of the things that are not right, and to embrace what He's done for us. It's only then that we will live the abundant life that He's prepared for us and have a heart whose "pulse may be His praise!"
Monday, February 1, 2010
Not Me Monday
Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week
So, we're starting off another week after a great weekend of snow and I am obviously a great mom and would never do bad mom things like...
Not bathe my kids for over a week. In our house we ALWAYS bathe on a regular basis. Any time I see gunk or grime behind their ears I'm quick to get it off. I would never think that a hot rag swiped over their faces and their hands would serve as a bath. So I don't know how that dirt that I can't get off has gotten behind Caleb's ears or how the inside of Karis' ears are more yellow than skin colored because I definitely have bathed my kids recently. I wouldn't go 9 days since their last baths, nope, NOT ME!!
I also definitely know how to hold my 10 month old baby on the kitchen table while putting her coat on her body. I would never accidently let go while reaching over her body for something else, and she wouldn't face plant off the table onto the kitchen floor. Then I wouldn't tell Caleb that he could not speak to me until Karis stopped screaming while I sat on the floor rocking her and praying that she was okay and didn't have a concussion, knocked out baby teeth, or a huge bruise on her face. Nope, not me! (As a side note, she is okay, but it was a rough five minutes for mama and baby!).
Because I am such a health nut about what my kids eat, I definitely wouldn't take them out to eat dinner at Taco Bell when they are on the verge of melting down. Then when Caleb knocked over Karis' baby food all over the Taco Bell table, I would NEVER scrape it back into her bowl in an act of desperation to salvage what was left of our meal and pacify her rumbling tummy. Nope, not me. I'm way too good of a mom for that!
I hope you enjoyed my "not me" moments and that they somehow made your day a little brighter:)
So, we're starting off another week after a great weekend of snow and I am obviously a great mom and would never do bad mom things like...
Not bathe my kids for over a week. In our house we ALWAYS bathe on a regular basis. Any time I see gunk or grime behind their ears I'm quick to get it off. I would never think that a hot rag swiped over their faces and their hands would serve as a bath. So I don't know how that dirt that I can't get off has gotten behind Caleb's ears or how the inside of Karis' ears are more yellow than skin colored because I definitely have bathed my kids recently. I wouldn't go 9 days since their last baths, nope, NOT ME!!
I also definitely know how to hold my 10 month old baby on the kitchen table while putting her coat on her body. I would never accidently let go while reaching over her body for something else, and she wouldn't face plant off the table onto the kitchen floor. Then I wouldn't tell Caleb that he could not speak to me until Karis stopped screaming while I sat on the floor rocking her and praying that she was okay and didn't have a concussion, knocked out baby teeth, or a huge bruise on her face. Nope, not me! (As a side note, she is okay, but it was a rough five minutes for mama and baby!).
Because I am such a health nut about what my kids eat, I definitely wouldn't take them out to eat dinner at Taco Bell when they are on the verge of melting down. Then when Caleb knocked over Karis' baby food all over the Taco Bell table, I would NEVER scrape it back into her bowl in an act of desperation to salvage what was left of our meal and pacify her rumbling tummy. Nope, not me. I'm way too good of a mom for that!
I hope you enjoyed my "not me" moments and that they somehow made your day a little brighter:)
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Let it Snow!
We have had so much fun in the snow. Of course Caleb loved it. What 2 (almost 3) year old boy wouldn't? However, Karis loved it too! She was so cute crawling around in it. We bundled her up in her own clothes and then put her big brothers' pants and jacket on her. It seems that she didn't have enough warm stuff of her own. I'm sure I could have found something smaller in the attic, but when you're trying to get outside within a small window of time, who's going to go rummaging through the attic to find something else to wear. Anyway, we were all warm and we all had a ball!
I did not have fun trying to upload pictures to facebook for the last HOUR!!! What is the world has happened that I can't get my pictures on there...anyway, here they are for the world to see:)
This is how cozy we've been on our snow days! They've been in their pajamas for two days and look closely...Karis is standing up by herself!
I did not have fun trying to upload pictures to facebook for the last HOUR!!! What is the world has happened that I can't get my pictures on there...anyway, here they are for the world to see:)
This is how cozy we've been on our snow days! They've been in their pajamas for two days and look closely...Karis is standing up by herself!
Friday, January 29, 2010
Trusting God
"I will instruct you (says the Lord) and guide you along the best pathway for your life; I will advise you and watch your progress." Psalm 32:8, TLB
I'm not even sure how to articulate this post into words other than to say that God's been doing some big work in my life and I'm really excited about it. I think this post is more for me to be able to articulate my thoughts than anything else. Let me start at the beginning.
Before Christmas I started reading the book Praying for Purpose for Women by Katie Brazelton. I felt like I was stuck in a rut and needed to seek God for what in the world I was supposed to be doing. Long story short, I started spending quality, consistant time with God each day and He has rocked my world since then (imagine that:).
The big word that He's given me is TRUST...not faith, but trust. My faith in God's ability to work in my life is fine in terms of provision, health, safety, etc. I never worry about what the present looks like because I know that God has my best interest at heart. What I found was that I was discontent with so many areas of my life. I wanted to live in the country, to stay at home with our kids, to not have so much responsibility at work. I found that I wasn't TRUSTING Him with my future dreams, the things I longed for. These feelings of discontentment and unrest came from a heart that doesn't trust that God has me in the right place all of the time when I'm walking with Him. I am here (location, job, responsibility, etc.) right now because I need to learn some things before I am ready to move forward into the things that I desire to have/do. The first thing on the list of things to learn is how to ask God to help me with the things that I already know how to do. For example, I lead devotions at Building Hope every afternoon. I can't remember the last time that I really petitioned God to show me what to teach and how to teach it. That's just pride...thinking that I've got everything under control and that I can do it on my own. I need to stop working on automatic and start asking the Holy Spirit to give me new fresh ideas in all areas - teaching, parenting, being a wife. The things he wants to teach me will rock my world. I know I just need to ask. It's okay to have dreams, goals, and aspirations, but when they leave me with a feeling of discontentment and unrest, then I am putting them above God and what He is doing in my life. I'm saying that I want more than what God is giving me. It's when I release those dreams to God and let him teach me what He wants me to learn right now, that I will be able to live abundantly in this moment and prepare for what God is waiting to do in my future...my wildest dreams and aspirations!
I'm not even sure how to articulate this post into words other than to say that God's been doing some big work in my life and I'm really excited about it. I think this post is more for me to be able to articulate my thoughts than anything else. Let me start at the beginning.
Before Christmas I started reading the book Praying for Purpose for Women by Katie Brazelton. I felt like I was stuck in a rut and needed to seek God for what in the world I was supposed to be doing. Long story short, I started spending quality, consistant time with God each day and He has rocked my world since then (imagine that:).
The big word that He's given me is TRUST...not faith, but trust. My faith in God's ability to work in my life is fine in terms of provision, health, safety, etc. I never worry about what the present looks like because I know that God has my best interest at heart. What I found was that I was discontent with so many areas of my life. I wanted to live in the country, to stay at home with our kids, to not have so much responsibility at work. I found that I wasn't TRUSTING Him with my future dreams, the things I longed for. These feelings of discontentment and unrest came from a heart that doesn't trust that God has me in the right place all of the time when I'm walking with Him. I am here (location, job, responsibility, etc.) right now because I need to learn some things before I am ready to move forward into the things that I desire to have/do. The first thing on the list of things to learn is how to ask God to help me with the things that I already know how to do. For example, I lead devotions at Building Hope every afternoon. I can't remember the last time that I really petitioned God to show me what to teach and how to teach it. That's just pride...thinking that I've got everything under control and that I can do it on my own. I need to stop working on automatic and start asking the Holy Spirit to give me new fresh ideas in all areas - teaching, parenting, being a wife. The things he wants to teach me will rock my world. I know I just need to ask. It's okay to have dreams, goals, and aspirations, but when they leave me with a feeling of discontentment and unrest, then I am putting them above God and what He is doing in my life. I'm saying that I want more than what God is giving me. It's when I release those dreams to God and let him teach me what He wants me to learn right now, that I will be able to live abundantly in this moment and prepare for what God is waiting to do in my future...my wildest dreams and aspirations!
Sunday, January 24, 2010
All Boy and a Sweet Girl!
Caleb went to stay with Mammy and Popper last week for a few days. While he was there, Mammy was working on a sewing project with her friend Betty, and Caleb learned how to "sew." In fact, he spent an hour, sitting still in their laps, trying different stiches and sewing scraps of fabric together. That day he also got to see some bulldozers, backhoes, etc...you know "boy stuff." The next day, Popper asked Caleb what his favorite part of the day before had been. Without hesitation he answered, "sewing!" Oh boy, those are the words that every Daddy is dying to hear his 2 (almost 3) year old boy say:) (Which by the way, when I told Ashley the story he said, "There's nothing wrong with knowing how to sew. Every man should learn." He, however, does not know how to sew, but it was a good response.)
Well, yesterday was a beautiful day...warmish and sunny, but due to the amount of rain we've had since November, our ground is completely saturated and any small amount produces major puddles. This is annoying for us as adults, but it is bliss for a kid. Caleb donned his rain boots, and hit the mud. He had so much fun getting completely filthy. My neighbor and I were talking while we watched him and she said, "Look at him, he is all boy." I agreed and then wondered if she'd say the same thing if she saw him sitting in front of a sewing machine:) Ha! He's such a fun kiddo!
Karis just turned 10 months a few days ago, and I could probably write a whole post about her. She is so much fun! I find myself taking videos of her all the time now. She stood up by herself a few times yesterday, she LOVES balls and anything that has to do with her big brother, she sings "fa la la la la, la la la la" with Caleb and I at breakfast, dances every time she hears music, loves to push her shopping cart, and is an absolute joy to be around all day long! We love her so much and love getting to see her sweet, fun loving personality emerging. She is a joy to our lives!
(This is the dress Caleb was "helping" sew. Isn't it precious!)
Well, yesterday was a beautiful day...warmish and sunny, but due to the amount of rain we've had since November, our ground is completely saturated and any small amount produces major puddles. This is annoying for us as adults, but it is bliss for a kid. Caleb donned his rain boots, and hit the mud. He had so much fun getting completely filthy. My neighbor and I were talking while we watched him and she said, "Look at him, he is all boy." I agreed and then wondered if she'd say the same thing if she saw him sitting in front of a sewing machine:) Ha! He's such a fun kiddo!
Karis just turned 10 months a few days ago, and I could probably write a whole post about her. She is so much fun! I find myself taking videos of her all the time now. She stood up by herself a few times yesterday, she LOVES balls and anything that has to do with her big brother, she sings "fa la la la la, la la la la" with Caleb and I at breakfast, dances every time she hears music, loves to push her shopping cart, and is an absolute joy to be around all day long! We love her so much and love getting to see her sweet, fun loving personality emerging. She is a joy to our lives!
(This is the dress Caleb was "helping" sew. Isn't it precious!)
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Baby Necessities and Rebukes!
While we love buying things for babies, if we are really honest with ourselves, they actually need very little until they get older. For instance, Karis has a lot of toys (granted most of them are hand-me-downs), but she is the most happy with some sort of straight, stick like object in her hand as she crawls around. She'll take Caleb's drumstick, Caleb's block (the long skinny kind), Caleb's wooden hammer, or any such thing and crawl with it, sit up and wave it around, put it in her mouth, talk to it, and then start it all over again. Babies are just not high maintenance when it comes to "stuff." However, there are certain things that are necessities, that have to be bought, and that aren't very cheap. There were three of these items that we needed, so I went to Target after work to pick them up (that's the thing about these "baby necessities." When you need them, YOU NEED THEM! There is no waiting until tomorrow). As I was saying, I had three things on my list.
1. New pacis - where do they go???? I put several in her crib each night so that when she loses one, she's bound to find another one without my help. In the morning, they are gone. Not all of them, but usually at least one is missing. They are not under the crib, not wedged between the bumper and the mattress, not in the slats of the crib, and I'm fairly certain that she hasn't eaten them. Where do they go??? Occasionally, I have SEARCHED in and around the crib, resigned myself to the fact that another one has gone missing, and put her to sleep anyway. When I check the next morning, I'll find one that's been missing for days but not the one that is the most recently missed. Ahhh, it's a mystery and if I'm not careful this is going to turn into a post of its own!
2. Bottle nipples - she has decided out of the blue that she really doesn't like to take bottles anymore. That's lovely Karis, thank you! I've known for a while that she needed to move up a level in nipples so that she had a faster flow, but I've been putting it off. After two days of not taking a bottle for the babysitter, I decided it was time for a new nipple. As a side note, it worked.
3. Breast milk storage bags - there is no explanation...when you're out, you're out. Gotta get more!
So, there I was a Target and the prices were ridiculously high. I mean $5.99 for TWO pacis...they're just going to get lost! I picked up my three things that aren't even fun to buy. I mean, no one can wear them, listen to them, read them, or use them for decorations. What fun are pacis, bottle nipples, and milk bags? No fun at all. I took my items to the register and the total came to $25. Ahhh, in our budget crunch world...that's a significant amount (for something not fun). I kind of sighed and looked at the cashier and said something to the effect of, "It really stinks to HAVE to buy these things and spend this much money on them." (This is where it gets good...don't you just love it when we get knocked off our high horse or our pitty party comes to a dramatic end). The cashier said, "I know. You know I don't know how people who are homeless or don't have any money take care of the things that we have to buy. Think about pads or tampons. Those are expensive and we have to buy them. How are they able to pay for them?" Whoa, I was totally taken off guard, but I responded appropriately and thought about it for a minute. Then she continued, "You know, we (she used the word we, but I think she meant you) should just be thankful that we have babies that we have to buy these things for. I know some women who can't have babies who would be thrilled to buy things like pacis and nipples. We are just so blessed." I was still in the "nodding and agreeing" mode, so I responded with something that was an acceptable response and told her to have a good day.
You may think that she was rude or over stepping her bounds, but as I walked out of the store, it sunk in...God just used the cashier at Target to fix my attitude. I was grumbling and complaining instead of being thankful for what I have. I was seeing the negative instead of the positive. I also learned something from her. Many times I just agree with what people are saying to me, even though I don't agree at all. I think I do it to avoid confrontation or keep from making someone feel uncomfortable. This lady didn't do that at all. She was nice, smiled the whole time, and didn't make it seem like a rebuke, but that's definitely what she was doing and I definitely needed it. So here are my thoughts for the day -
1. I'm fixing my attitude and looking for the blessings in everything. It's not cliche, it's good for us. I'm going to stop complaining...period.
2. I'm going to stop agreeing when I don't really agree...tactfully. Hopefully I can learn from the cashier and do it with love. You never know, it might change someone's attitude:)
1. New pacis - where do they go???? I put several in her crib each night so that when she loses one, she's bound to find another one without my help. In the morning, they are gone. Not all of them, but usually at least one is missing. They are not under the crib, not wedged between the bumper and the mattress, not in the slats of the crib, and I'm fairly certain that she hasn't eaten them. Where do they go??? Occasionally, I have SEARCHED in and around the crib, resigned myself to the fact that another one has gone missing, and put her to sleep anyway. When I check the next morning, I'll find one that's been missing for days but not the one that is the most recently missed. Ahhh, it's a mystery and if I'm not careful this is going to turn into a post of its own!
2. Bottle nipples - she has decided out of the blue that she really doesn't like to take bottles anymore. That's lovely Karis, thank you! I've known for a while that she needed to move up a level in nipples so that she had a faster flow, but I've been putting it off. After two days of not taking a bottle for the babysitter, I decided it was time for a new nipple. As a side note, it worked.
3. Breast milk storage bags - there is no explanation...when you're out, you're out. Gotta get more!
So, there I was a Target and the prices were ridiculously high. I mean $5.99 for TWO pacis...they're just going to get lost! I picked up my three things that aren't even fun to buy. I mean, no one can wear them, listen to them, read them, or use them for decorations. What fun are pacis, bottle nipples, and milk bags? No fun at all. I took my items to the register and the total came to $25. Ahhh, in our budget crunch world...that's a significant amount (for something not fun). I kind of sighed and looked at the cashier and said something to the effect of, "It really stinks to HAVE to buy these things and spend this much money on them." (This is where it gets good...don't you just love it when we get knocked off our high horse or our pitty party comes to a dramatic end). The cashier said, "I know. You know I don't know how people who are homeless or don't have any money take care of the things that we have to buy. Think about pads or tampons. Those are expensive and we have to buy them. How are they able to pay for them?" Whoa, I was totally taken off guard, but I responded appropriately and thought about it for a minute. Then she continued, "You know, we (she used the word we, but I think she meant you) should just be thankful that we have babies that we have to buy these things for. I know some women who can't have babies who would be thrilled to buy things like pacis and nipples. We are just so blessed." I was still in the "nodding and agreeing" mode, so I responded with something that was an acceptable response and told her to have a good day.
You may think that she was rude or over stepping her bounds, but as I walked out of the store, it sunk in...God just used the cashier at Target to fix my attitude. I was grumbling and complaining instead of being thankful for what I have. I was seeing the negative instead of the positive. I also learned something from her. Many times I just agree with what people are saying to me, even though I don't agree at all. I think I do it to avoid confrontation or keep from making someone feel uncomfortable. This lady didn't do that at all. She was nice, smiled the whole time, and didn't make it seem like a rebuke, but that's definitely what she was doing and I definitely needed it. So here are my thoughts for the day -
1. I'm fixing my attitude and looking for the blessings in everything. It's not cliche, it's good for us. I'm going to stop complaining...period.
2. I'm going to stop agreeing when I don't really agree...tactfully. Hopefully I can learn from the cashier and do it with love. You never know, it might change someone's attitude:)
Friday, January 8, 2010
Forgiveness
One thing we've been working on lately is Caleb eating his breakfast by himself. I always blend a really good concoction of fruit, avacado, almonds, lettuce, etc. It's what we all eat every morning. He's been eating it since he started eating and loves it. What he does not love is eating it by himself. He'd much rather have someone spoon feed it to him. He's been doing really well, eating almost to the bottom with very little fuss and then having me scrape the bottom to get the rest of it. Well, this morning he woke up hungry and ate a little bit before breakfast. When we sat down at the table to eat, he WOULD NOT eat. I tried to stay in control of my patience. We sang some songs and did all the things that we normally do, but he was not touching his spoon. I tried all kinds of tricks and bribes that normally work with absolutely no luck. Finally, I left the table with Karis and told Caleb that he could come and play with us when he finished his breakfast. This always works...not this morning. Every time I peeked in the kitchen, he was just sitting at the table NOT eating. I was really losing my patience, but yet still managing to keep it toned down for him (no sense in "fighting" about eating). Finally I went and sat down beside him. I'm just going to write out our conversation...remember this is all in a normal tone...I really was keeping my voice under control.
Mommy "I am very disappointed that you didn't eat your breakfast by yourself."
Caleb "Uh-huh."
Mommy, beginning to spoon it into his mouth "You are a big boy now, and you are ready to feed yourself. You do it every morning. This really upsets me a lot."
Caleb "I'm sorry Mommy."
Mommy with a sigh "Caleb, I'm just really too upset to forgive you right now."
Caleb "OK"
A few minutes later
Caleb "I'm sorry Mommy."
Mommy "Caleb, I'm just still really upset and I really can't tell you that I forgive you yet because I don't. You know how to eat your breakfast."
Another minute later
Caleb "Mommy, I'm sorry."
Mommy, scraping out the last bite for him with a big sigh "Caleb, I forgive you. I just want you to eat your breakfast by yourself. OK?"
Caleb "OK Mommy, now can I chew my gum?"
Mommy "Yes, please go chew your gum."
It is a funny story, but while I was not forgiving him, I thought about God and His willingness to forgive us every time. Ah, we disobey, gossip, don't read our Bibles or pray, cause strife, envy others, let our bodies get out of shape (which are God's temple), judge others, and just generally sin. Yet, when the Holy Spirit convicts us and we repent, God doesn't say, "I'm just too upset with you to forgive you right now." He simply forgives. My reason for not forgiving Caleb this morning was that I didn't think he really meant it. He's been into saying "I'm sorry" for a few weeks now. I wanted him to show me that he was sorry (and I needed some time to cool down). Sometimes I "repent" and don't really mean it. Does that mean that God doesn't forgive me? No! His grace is endless and His love surpasses all understanding. It certainly surpassed mine this morning. It's a good thing that I'm just the Mommy and not God! It's also a good thing that I have a good Father to learn from...a patient, kind, understanding, and FORGIVING Father.
Mommy "I am very disappointed that you didn't eat your breakfast by yourself."
Caleb "Uh-huh."
Mommy, beginning to spoon it into his mouth "You are a big boy now, and you are ready to feed yourself. You do it every morning. This really upsets me a lot."
Caleb "I'm sorry Mommy."
Mommy with a sigh "Caleb, I'm just really too upset to forgive you right now."
Caleb "OK"
A few minutes later
Caleb "I'm sorry Mommy."
Mommy "Caleb, I'm just still really upset and I really can't tell you that I forgive you yet because I don't. You know how to eat your breakfast."
Another minute later
Caleb "Mommy, I'm sorry."
Mommy, scraping out the last bite for him with a big sigh "Caleb, I forgive you. I just want you to eat your breakfast by yourself. OK?"
Caleb "OK Mommy, now can I chew my gum?"
Mommy "Yes, please go chew your gum."
It is a funny story, but while I was not forgiving him, I thought about God and His willingness to forgive us every time. Ah, we disobey, gossip, don't read our Bibles or pray, cause strife, envy others, let our bodies get out of shape (which are God's temple), judge others, and just generally sin. Yet, when the Holy Spirit convicts us and we repent, God doesn't say, "I'm just too upset with you to forgive you right now." He simply forgives. My reason for not forgiving Caleb this morning was that I didn't think he really meant it. He's been into saying "I'm sorry" for a few weeks now. I wanted him to show me that he was sorry (and I needed some time to cool down). Sometimes I "repent" and don't really mean it. Does that mean that God doesn't forgive me? No! His grace is endless and His love surpasses all understanding. It certainly surpassed mine this morning. It's a good thing that I'm just the Mommy and not God! It's also a good thing that I have a good Father to learn from...a patient, kind, understanding, and FORGIVING Father.
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