Trusting God

"I will instruct you (says the Lord) and guide you along the best pathway for your life; I will advise you and watch your progress." Psalm 32:8, TLB

I'm not even sure how to articulate this post into words other than to say that God's been doing some big work in my life and I'm really excited about it. I think this post is more for me to be able to articulate my thoughts than anything else. Let me start at the beginning.

Before Christmas I started reading the book Praying for Purpose for Women by Katie Brazelton. I felt like I was stuck in a rut and needed to seek God for what in the world I was supposed to be doing. Long story short, I started spending quality, consistant time with God each day and He has rocked my world since then (imagine that:).

The big word that He's given me is TRUST...not faith, but trust. My faith in God's ability to work in my life is fine in terms of provision, health, safety, etc. I never worry about what the present looks like because I know that God has my best interest at heart. What I found was that I was discontent with so many areas of my life. I wanted to live in the country, to stay at home with our kids, to not have so much responsibility at work. I found that I wasn't TRUSTING Him with my future dreams, the things I longed for. These feelings of discontentment and unrest came from a heart that doesn't trust that God has me in the right place all of the time when I'm walking with Him. I am here (location, job, responsibility, etc.) right now because I need to learn some things before I am ready to move forward into the things that I desire to have/do. The first thing on the list of things to learn is how to ask God to help me with the things that I already know how to do. For example, I lead devotions at Building Hope every afternoon. I can't remember the last time that I really petitioned God to show me what to teach and how to teach it. That's just pride...thinking that I've got everything under control and that I can do it on my own. I need to stop working on automatic and start asking the Holy Spirit to give me new fresh ideas in all areas - teaching, parenting, being a wife. The things he wants to teach me will rock my world. I know I just need to ask. It's okay to have dreams, goals, and aspirations, but when they leave me with a feeling of discontentment and unrest, then I am putting them above God and what He is doing in my life. I'm saying that I want more than what God is giving me. It's when I release those dreams to God and let him teach me what He wants me to learn right now, that I will be able to live abundantly in this moment and prepare for what God is waiting to do in my future...my wildest dreams and aspirations!